American Idol
April 30, 2008
For those of you Googling “American Idol,” welcome to my blog. As I’ve learned from my Stat Counter, there are many avenues to my blog, none of which I’m particularly proud. Apparently, Googling, “Bleached Anus,” will get you here, as will “I ruv it asian,” as will “poop.” (No surprise there.) I’m expiramenting a bit to see if I can win Time Magazine’s Blogger of the Year award just by using a common pop-culture term in my title. Tune in later for the results.
In the mean time, I was tagged by Expat to complete the following exercise:
- Post the rules on your blog
- Write six random things about yourself in a blog post
- Tag six people in your post
- Let each person know they are tagged by leaving a comment on their blog
- Let the tagger know your entry is up
This is not going to be easy because I have no secrets to share. I’ve actually written just about everything there is to know about me, which frightens me into oblivion.
Now, Expat indicated on her blog that we are virtual twins. This is true. There are a few minor differences, however. First, Expat does not have the same hang-ups about religion as do I. Second, Expat considers listening to others’ differing points of view as a challenge and a growing experience, while I consider the same experience merely annoying and a waste of precious time. Third, Expat is a true adventurer, having lived all over the world and having raised a kind, well-functioning family unit at the same time. I could not do this. Here’s to you, Expat!
Here are six random things, hopefully heretofore unpublished:
- Every night I wear a t-shirt to bed that says, “Ask me about my explosive diarreah.” My husband thinks I’m irresistible.
- I scored in the thirteenth percentile in the Spatial Orientation section of the pre-college tests (this is out of 100, folks). This is the exercise that requires you to figure out which way the wheels are turning. If you think THIS is bad, Leezerslawpartner, one of the best attorneys in the whole US of A, scored a SIX! He told me, “I didn’t even think this was possible.” Adorable, that one.
- I secretly think I’m sort of funny-looking.
- I am so weary of telling my seven-year old, roughly seven times a day, how old our two-year old Shih Tzu is in “human years.” Now I just tell her “Two. same age as he is in dog years.”
- My best friend Ruthie from childhood died in 1994. She’s in nearly every dream of mine. Recently, in such a dream, I asked her,”why are you always here.” She said, “that’s our agreement. I’ll always be here whether you need me or not.” It’s sort of comforting. MCS reminds me a lot of Ruthie but I don’t tell her very often out of fear I’ll creep her out.
- In the fifth grade, I held two older girls hostage in the girls bathroom. They couldn’t leave until they said the secret password, “shoes in your mouth, yeah yeah yeah.” After the bell rang and we were discovered missing, the sixth grade teacher found us, sent the hostages back to class, and told me I would be the first female in Lake Youngs Elementary School history to receive a hack. He pounded the hack paddle into his palm, then at the last minute he let me go, sans hack. I’m sure a lawsuit from my parents was the only thing that stopped him cold.
Tagged: Mae, Lisa, Lengli, Naynay, Pixie, Kitkat
May 1, 2008 at 12:19 am
Okay, I totally left a comment earlier. Where did it go?
I’ll take care of my “tag” very, very soon.
(I just typed “spoon” instead of “soon.”
May 1, 2008 at 7:41 am
I came for the “I ruv it asian” and I stayed for the… well… “I ruv it asian”
May 1, 2008 at 9:45 am
First, thanks Leezer for your kind words.
Secondly, who says I do not have religious hangups? In fact, I think my blog fairly vibrates with them.
Thirdly, you are smarter than me and know how to shut people up faster.
4) I would have scored a 2 on Spatial Orientation (but then again, you know I am only qualified to be a general in the US Army. Sucks to be me).
Finally, Ruthie: MCS would not be creeped out. If you are conversing with Ruthie in your dreams, you are in a semi-lucid state and that is the sign of a trained dreamer. You should be very comforted. No hangups there!
xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoox
May 1, 2008 at 3:46 pm
If you were here, I’d make you drink a big fresh cup of excellent coffee and then I’d give you a hug because I could NOT have loved your hostage story MORE!!
May 1, 2008 at 5:14 pm
Kitkat:
I love the fact you are a writer and a writing instructor and you typed “spoon.” Hee hee.
May 1, 2008 at 5:15 pm
Othurme:
I for the life of me can’t figure out what the person searching for “i ruv it asian” would find in my blog. I’ve commented a few times about my adopted daughter, but PLEASE!
May 1, 2008 at 5:16 pm
Expat:
I think I’ve told MCS about Ruthie before and she wasn’t too creeped out. THere are differences, mind you. Ruthie was a little more Woo-Woo in terms of her willingness to entertain psychic phenomenon. Maybe that’s how she contacts me in my dreams.
May 1, 2008 at 5:17 pm
Cris:
Thank you! Cyber hugs are the best!
May 1, 2008 at 11:37 pm
Leezer…Sorry, but the teacher needlessly worried about a lawsuit. I believe we would have been prouder of a family member holding a school record!
May 1, 2008 at 11:56 pm
I did it! I would write more, but I seriously should have gone home a half hour ago. Eeee. (that’s me yanking my collar, Letterman style.)
May 2, 2008 at 2:48 am
I’m not creeped out at all; I think it is very cool and an honor. I’m starting to believe more in the “Woo Woo” ever since my mom broke her left ankle and I impaled my left foot with a rake at virtually the same moment while 75+ miles away from each other.
May 2, 2008 at 12:32 pm
Okay, my six random things are up. They aren’t nearly as witty as yours, but I gotta try.
May 2, 2008 at 2:59 pm
“Ask me about my explosive diarreah.”
I’ve almost certain that I knew this about you. Maybe you even blogged about it.
My sixth grade teacher often wore his favorite shirt what said “projectile vomit” and had a drawing of a man doing just that.
May 4, 2008 at 5:10 pm
I did this meme this morning. I think you’ll get a kick out of some things that I wrote. Well, I hope so anyways….
May 5, 2008 at 5:07 pm
Mopardad:
Yes, you would have been so proud telling the Battles and the Olsens about my “record.”
May 5, 2008 at 5:07 pm
Lisa:
I’ve been without a computer since last Tuesday, so this morning I’ll hop over to your blog to catch up!
May 5, 2008 at 5:08 pm
Moodring:
Good. I’m glad you’re getting more Woo Woo. Just don’t hang a dream-catcher thingy on your rear view mirror. Then I’ll tell you you’ve gone too far.
May 5, 2008 at 5:09 pm
Kitkat:
Don’t sell yourself short.
May 5, 2008 at 5:10 pm
Lotb:
I wish I had your sixth grade teacher.
I DID blog about that shirt. My daughter was mortified when I wore it in the driveway one morning as I said goodbye to my husband leaving for work. You have a good memory!